


I can't make you love me

by therabbithole



Category: Hunger Games Series - All Media Types, Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-22
Updated: 2013-04-22
Packaged: 2017-11-26 02:37:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 469
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/645615
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/therabbithole/pseuds/therabbithole
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She closes her eyes every time we make love. I can’t help but wonder if she’s thinking of him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I can't make you love me

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own anything, not The Hunger Games or Bon Iver's songs, not even a dog.

_I’ll close my eyes_  
_Then I won’t see_  
_The love you don’t feel_  
_When you’re holding me_

\- Bon Iver

 

We’re lying in bed. As we do every night for the last three years. I should be happy. The love of my life, the girl of my dream in my arms. She’s trying. God, I know she is. I’m her best friend and I know she loves me. I will always be a part of her as she will always be a part of me. But I also know I am not him. I never will be. She is so close but so so far away.

She closes her eyes every time we make love. I can’t help but wonder if she’s thinking of him. And then I close my eyes because I don't want to see the hurt in her face and how much she wishes I was somebody else. When she falls asleep she screams his name.

I came back five years ago when I heard what happened. She has always been strong and independent. She never wanted to end like her mother and yet that is exactly what happened. She didn’t speak for months; she was like a soulless vacuum. It took me almost a year to get her to at least leave her house. She went to the woods but avoided his tree. She said she wasn’t ready. She didn’t want to say goodbye.

We made love when she came home after the first time she visited him. She wanted to get distracted. She was mad at him for leaving her. I should be angry because I know she was just using me. But I wasn’t. Because I love her. And if that’s what she needs me for, then that's what I’m going to be.

Even years after the war, Peeta seemed to be unable to win the fight against his own demons. He saw things no one else saw, felt things no one else understood. He always believed that his greatest fear has become reality. That they turned him into a monster. That he was not more than just a piece in their games. Katniss tried. She did everything to help him. Help him realize it’s not his fault that his family, Rue, Prim, Finnick and all the others died. She made sure to tell him every single day that she is never going to leave. She is here to stay. Always. She loved him. And she always will. But his own reality was too much for him to handle. She found him one day hanging on a tree with a note in his hand: _I love you. I’m sorry_

I know I can’t make her love me as much as I love her. But she’s here and we’re together. And that’s enough for me.


End file.
